Although I wouldn't want to repeat them, I thank God for them. Because we hung on and didn't give up, we have a closeness now that gives a new meaning to "...and they will become one flesh." Genesis 2:24. Or as the marriage ceremony usually puts it as "and the two will become one."
Just to be clear, those painful growing moments were not all caused by us against each other. Most of them were caused by circumstances and others who thought they knew us and judged us because of lies, selfishness, hatred, misunderstandings, and the past. No he is not perfect, but neither am I.
One thing he has never done is lie to me. There has been times he didn't tell the whole truth at first. There are times I wish he would have lied, but he didn't. I love him for that.
I also look back at the things we have shared. The secrets between us that no one knows or will they ever know. That is ours alone. He knows me better than anyone and I know him better that anyone. He has told me things that he had never told anyone about his past because he trusts me with his heart. And I trust him with mine.
He is the most compassionate, caring, unselfish, sacrificing man I know. Yes others sometime sees a rough, tough, gruff exterior. But that is just his defense mechanism. He is easily hurt by others snide remarks or rejection.
We have awesome kids. We can't take all the credit. Like all parents we have made mistakes. But everything we did was for their benefit. We were really just children ourselves, trying to raise children. But they knew they were loved. I hope now they know that they were and are loved unconditionally. Most kids do not realize that until they are adults.
We didn't send them to church, we TOOK them. He had shown them by example what a real Christian is. Not by doing everything right but by how he treated people. He showed respect to those who never deserved respect. He forgave others without being asked for forgiveness. He always lifted up the underdog, the unlovable, the untouchable.
He showed his children that real men cry. He is a big, strong, fearless man, yet he has cried unashamedly in public. He cried when he gave his daughter away in marriage, making everyone else cry. He cries watching "Its A Wonderful Life" almost every time. I love that about him. I love the tenderness of his heart.
The love he has for our grandchildren is amazing and they adore him right back.
He is humble, quiet, and strong.
His faith in Jesus is unshakable. It is personal and I love that about him.
Even though I loved the man I married I am glad he is not that man now...he is so much better.
Happy 40th Anniversary to my one true love on April 20, 2014.
.
